Day 11-Have you ever cried looking at the SCALE?

Day 11

Have you ever cried looking at your bathroom scale?

I did today.
I cried out of relief. Gratitude. Happiness. And a million other emotions I'm not able to pinpoint. I started crying because I hadn't seen the following number in I don't know how many years...5? I'm thinner with Kenzie than I was with Sean at this same age. When he was 14 months, I was 160 and when I got prego with Kenzie one month later, I had dropped to 152, and then well, Y'ALL know what came next. Eating and more eating and more weight gain, so on and so forth.

I haven't seen this number in a long time. I started crying as I typed my text to Ginger to tell her. 

 Can I be completely honest...

I have not wanted to have any more children because, out of fear, what if I "can't" lose the weight? What if I'm stuck in this body for the rest of my life, constantly working out, trying to eat right, but to no avail? It is depressing. Jordan and I are hesitant first, because having another kid is going to be crazy, but secondly, for me, I don't want to be fat and out of shape the rest of my life. (We aren't having another one anytime soon for those that want to know, like 3 years or more if it does happen)

So, I hope y'all can understand the relief that the above photo gives me. I NOW know how to eat right, and the rest is history. I feel so empowered. Really, you have no idea.

I would get so angry when I would read in my jogging class lessons that "to maintain a healthy weight and to lose weight one needs to limit their sugars, refined breads, etc, etc, etc..." Even at Weight Watchers, they would be like well you can EAT anything you want as long as you stay in your points...well people, for those of us with weakness towards cakes, pasta, and Chicken in a Bisket crackers, those pretty little points can get blown pretty quickly and then I'm HUNGRY HUNGRY HUNGRY cause I didn't do it right. Too much emphasis is on protein and as stated before you don't flipping need protein, you need living enzymes!

What does that mean? How does someone ever learn how to really eat for health and weight loss and not feel terrible the whole time!!!!?????

That is why I love eating this way. I feel really good. I don't feel deprived and most importantly I get flipping results! I don't have to kill myself working out, I can enjoy physical activity and not stress about my calorie burn.

Truly this is a liberating and enjoyable way to eat and live our life!

Lastly, before the food!


Natalia Rose posed a very interesting question last night as I was listening to her Q & A, mp3's.

What do our old people look like? Do we ever REALLY see the very old? No.

They are locked away or we are "too" busy to visit them.

How sad. I thought about what our grandparents and great grandparents died from, are dying from...what are my parents struggling with in their mid 60's?

Is it food related? Our culture?

What is really killing us? Is it a myriad of diseases? Or is it really just decades of abuse to our bodies through food, work, and a disconnect from our souls and spirituality?

I've been thinking...which get's interesting sometimes, haha...and I wanted to look back and see what "killed" or is killing my older family members.

I've thought a lot about it and realized that ultimately God is in control. If it is time for me it is time, but I want to give myself the best opportunity and chance at this thing! I only have one body and I want it to last me as long as possible! :)

Alrighty!

So dinner was the same from Day 1

But today, I made for Jordan and the kiddos this granola that is so good to have as a snack while I'm gone!!!! You must try. ( And No, I cannot have any right now, just for the next 19 days)

If you need a dehydrator, I'm sure your mother has one collecting dust, or a garage sale, craigslist, or KSL are all great places to look.  Really, you've got to get one just so you can make kale chips and of course this granola!

You must first, activate your nuts...this turned into a serious laugh fest with my friend Lisa when I told her you must soak your nuts in water before you eat or do anything with them.

These are pecans, dates, and raisins being activated and reconstituted.

You want to follow the Granola recipe...and of course, I got this from my girl Ginger!

My 1971 Harvest Maid Dehydrator. It's great because I can set the temp. Very important for raw dehydrated recipes. VERY!

Yes, I know this looks like I'm dehydrating poo, but no worries, I ain't.

Look at those seeds and bits of apple. I accidentally food processed my blueberries and raisins cause I wasn't paying attention to the recipe. Don't make the same mistake!

ENJOY!