I struggle with my weight. It's called a struggle for a reason. For days I can do great and then one day I don't and it throws me off. I try to only have it take me off track for that one day, but I've had it happen where a week or more has passed.
And then I'm like OH CRAP! I've gained a lot of weight back.
Now people say, "well, that's why I don't diet, or call it a diet. Cause then I am setting myself up to fail."
I received a text from Ginger a few days ago with the following quote:
"You haven't failed until you have quit trying." Elder Marvin J. Ashton.
That's right! I am completely changing 29 years of bad eating habits, with extremely healthy and good eating habits. It's going to take some time. And when I give up and go back to the old ways of eating including the following:
I can eat whatever I want if I'm under 1500 calories
protein heavy
gym foods
processed foods
Splenda is good for you and any other fake sugar
limit your fruits mentality
then I have failed.
Over the past year it has been hard, I'm not going to lie. I started down this path when Kenzie was 6 months old, and had maintained 175+ LBS post baby for 6 MONTHS! I was running/walking 3 days a week and "trying" to eat right.
But really what is eating right. Now I know that this is truly different for every person. And yes, you can calorie count and workout every day and lose the weight.
I get sick of calorie counting and marking down everything I eat.
But get this, I allowed myself over the month of January the following:
Juice till dinner, liquids
Snack/eat around 2:30 or 3:00 carrots, veggies
Fruits ok to eat around that time too
Eat properly combined every day
Have 1 CHEAT meal a week, if I so desire
Work out every day (my average calorie burn was between 300 and 500 calories a day)
Body brush
Have colonics or enemas
Take a probiotic in the morning
Take 1 to 2 magnesium oxide at night
You might be wondering what the point of this post is? Well, last Tuesday I weighed myself and the scale said 143. When I started at the beginning of January I was 148 lbs. I was SO MAD Tuesday. That means for a whole month of being so strict I had only lost 5 lbs. I got a phone call from Ginger later that day (I believe Jordan told her to call me cause I was so mad).
And this is basically what she said.
YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE TO BE VERY STRICT! Did you read what I've been doing? I am pretty strict as it is!
NO CHEAT NIGHTS
ELIMINATE FRUIT (this is only for a while, till I hit my goal)
NOT NUTS OR SEED MEALS (peanuts, especially peanut butter are extremely difficult for women to digest)
ONLY HAVE A MEAT BASED MEAL ONCE OR TWICE A WEEK(meaning eggs or cheese or fish)
AND after our phone call, I had a new determination. I was going to be even more strict and I was going to get the weight off!
I also said I was going to put the scale away, but I have issues with weighing myself, and well since I've really only had this struggle since I started having kids, which was 5 years ago, I am still working through some things.
So I weighed again on Wednesday, after eating PERFECT on Tuesday, and you know what the scale said!? 145!!!!!! WHAT THE!!!! I was besides myself. SO I got off the scale, got back on and it said 141. WHAT? I got back on and it said 143 and was delaying and being weird.
I then realized, I truly have a BROKEN SCALE! Isn't this what we all wish for, haha!
So on Thursday night I bought a new scale, and Friday I weighed myself after eating perfect Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday.
GUESS what I weighed as of Saturday morning, cause yes I weighed Friday and then again Saturday...
139.
So really in the month of January I lost 9 lbs. This was without calorie counting. I ate as strict and as best I could allowing myself some cheats, which really only happened when we were out socially. (I need to work on this)
But I was curious, to see how many calories I was eating with doing this and feeling satisfied.
Well the days I did it on myfitnesspal.com I ate 1500 calories, and yes my biggest meal was my nighttime meal, and I still lost!
And NOW I am only weighing myself every Friday, with my girl Ginger! :)
And gosh darn it, I'm still doing this properly combined because it works and the way I feel, even though at times it can be a lot of work, I feel incredible.
Cause after all, this is more than just weight loss, right? I want to feel good, have mental clarity, eat things that will fight cancer not create it, give me amazing skin and hair cause I eat and drink foods that flood my body with living enzymes! Really, I am on such a roll I can't stop.
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Very simple. Very satisfying. Learning to be content with less. |
As I was talking to a friend about this the other day I relayed the following story about how amazing and grace-filled Ginger is with me. On one of my cheat days we were going to have pizza with some friends and I sent her a message earlier in the day to see what she would do.
Well she suggested first to not eat any pizza and just the salad I brought. Then she said you can eat the pizza just no cheese. But well, it would be my cheat day and well, homemade pizza was sounding really good.
So she ended it with the following:
"Just know it's life and energy draining. As long as you go into it knowing its not a healthful choice for your body, but you're ok with that for this meal then enjoy. And be present so you don't over eat."
That pretty much sums up the thinking behind this type of eating. I feel our Heavenly Father gave us the word of wisdom for a reason. Fruits and vegetables, herbs and grains are here for our use.
Losing the weight takes so much work. I am tired of putting in the work, not being as disciplined and gaining back. This struggle needs to end and the more I eat right and work towards a healthy weight with the right foods, the less strict I will need to be and the struggle can end. (WHICH MEANS I can eat more nuts, cause I love pecans and almonds, OH MY!)
I am grateful for an eating plan that is teaching me to love the taste of vegetables and making them the base of my meals. I am grateful for a friend that has been so supportive, never asking a dime and doing this all because she is so loving and giving and wants everyone to feel and be healthy. I am grateful for this plan because of how amazing I feel on it, how great my skin and hair are. I look forward to having great skin as I age because I am taking care of my body the right way. I love that at night when I get snacky and naturally want more food, I can give my body just that, all the nutritious food it can handle. I am learning a way of eating that will never be a fad, because when will they ever come out and say, "Fruits and vegetables have been found to cause heart disease and colon cancer".
But this has taken me a year + to get to this point. To decide YES! This is the way I want to eat and be! Always starting my meal with a salad. Making my meal stay in an easy to digest category so my body can spend less time digesting and more time healing my body and giving it what it needs. As I get to my healthy chosen weight I will start incorporating more lunch salads and meals and only juicing till lunch. But for now I have a goal, and well, Jordan and I might be going to Las Vegas for one of his work trips, and I want to feel really good in a swimsuit and not think, man I really need some swim shorts to cover up this big 'ol bootie of mine!
My goal from this post is to have hopefully shown you that I too fail. Struggle with making the right food choices, even when I know better. That I give into stress and social eating and that most importantly, I AM NOT PERFECT! I am on a path that is the right one, that fits me like a glove when I, I I I I I follow it. Cause when I don't follow it, well, then it just leads to a lot of frustration.
I am not one of those girls that can eat whatever I like and stay thin, I don't have great self control, I DO NOT lose my baby weight through nursing, if anything it makes me extremely RAVENOUS, I can't drink soda, diet or full sugar, I gain weight and it makes me eat MORE. I know I have to be so careful and I just can't indulge anymore. It is just the way I am.
After more than a year, I think I am maybe beginning to accept that!
Lastly, I am working on
BEING PRESENT WHEN I EAT.
Some of you will understand this...