I probably need counseling, but since I don't really want to go this blog will just have to do...
Kenzie woke me up about 20 minutes ago needing a snuggle and a banana. Whatever girl, just fill that belly and go back to bed. If only I could go back to bed.
Sometimes you don't know how much you miss something or someone until they are completely ripped out of your life.
you can't call them
you can't remember certain things about them
you can't have them give you a hug or a small word of encouragement
This last year has been, oh pretty awful when it comes to people leaving my life.
I didn't realize how much I truly loved my husband's mother until she was gone and no longer a part of our lives.
Since I'm lying here crying in my bed remembering my children's grandmother and wishing she could make with me one last batch of carrot pudding and tell the same story for the hundredth time, I might as well post a few things to maybe help a few of you not take for granted a few of your blessings.
First
If you have grandchildren, and you are a grandparent, please stop spending so much selfish time on yourself. Someday you will not be able to get out of your house to visit them, and chances are they will be so busy, that your grandchildren will find it difficult to visit you. Please know that when you aren't around, your grandchildren worship you and talk about you like you are some famous magical being. It is truly precious and something I love seeing and hearing.
Second
If you are in good health, please continue to take care of yourself. Stop eating so much meat and refined/processed foods. If you are on medication that would go away if you ate better, for Nadine's sake, please, stop your medication and start eating to live.
Third
If you are a mother or father of children who have not seen their grandparents for whatever stupid reason, please move on and let your children have a truly amazing relationship they can't get anywhere else. Forgive, forget, and move on.
My desire is that my children will grow up knowing Nadine and the amazing, wonderful, and loving grandmother she was. I hope I get it right. I only get one shot at this thing called Life.
I started watching Forks over Knives tonight, probably part of my emotional mess at 1am. Learning about the foods that turn on and off the cancer gene in each of us. But it's not just cancer I hate, it's other preventable diseases that we as Americans mask with drugs like Diabetes, heart disease, and chronic fatigue.
Oh, you didn't know that chronic fatigue is a disease? Think about all those Starbucks and Diet Cokes and oh, my personal favorite, Red Bull (I actually can't stand the taste of that cough syrup for a drink), and the amazing drug caffeine has become in our society to help keep us awake. And then because caffeine does such a great job of keeping us awake, we go to the doctor to get a sleeping pill to help us fall asleep...that just sounds DUMB doesn't it?
Please WAKE UP and start living and seeing that there is more to this life than yourself, Facebook, and your iPhone.
And just so you know, I am guilty as charged by the above statement.
